Bully Big Sis

Being an eldest child, I fully understand the desire, the need even, to torment younger siblings.  They are just such easy targets.

I have to say though, it is not nearly as fun when you have to be the parent and deal with the fallout (aka meltdowns) that result from said bullying.

Now, I know that sometimes Isabelle does things for no reason other than a rise from her brother.  Other times… well, Eli is two and apparently a little overly sensitive.

A few examples from the past week:

Isabelle:  Alla-kazam!  Eli you are a FROG!

Eli:  I don’t wanna be a fro-og!  I Eli.  I not wanna be a froooog.

Me:  You still look like Eli to me.  Sissy’s magic must not work on you.

Eli:  Yeah Sissy.  Your magic not work.

Isabelle:  Alla-kazam!  Eli you are a rabbit!

Eli, in tears collapsing to the ground:  Sissy turn me into rabbit!  I not wannnnna be rabbit!

Playing on the couch in the living room.  The floor is a dangerous alligator infested swamp.

Eli, jumping down: I need my screwdriver

Isabelle:  NOOOO!  Eli you are dead!  The alligators ate you dead!

Eli, collapsing to the ground in tears (yes, this is a pattern):  I not wanna be dead!

Me:  You don’t sound dead.  Dead people can’t talk.  You must have beat the alligators.

Eli:  Yeah Sissy, I beat the alligators.  I not dead.

Isabelle:  Nu-uh.  They ate you.  They ate you dead.

Eli: *collapse*  *tears*  I not wannnnnna be dead!

Isabelle to Eli:  I am calling “991” and the police are going to come get you.

Eli: *ignore* *plays with trucks*

Isabelle to “police”: Yes, you need to come get my brother and put him in jail.  He never gets to see his Grandma or Papa Ross never again.  Yes, he is a bad boy.

Eli:  NO SISSY!!  I not wanna never see Grandma and Papa Ross again!  I’d miss them!

Me: *ignore*

Isabelle:  Yes, he is at his house and he needs to go to jail forever.  No, he can’t have his toys or blankie either.

Eli:  *crying* I want my BLANKIE!!!!  I no want go to jaaaaaiiiiillll!

Outside, pretending the swingset is a pirate ship.  In the midst of a heated pretend sword fight, on the slide platform

Isabelle:  Arg!  I got you now! 

Eli:  Nu-uh!  I get you.

Isabelle:  Sit down or I’ll stab you with my sword!

Eli complies and Isabelle pushes him down the slide exclaiming: You just walked the plank you bad pirate!  Now the crocodiles are going to eat you!

Eli:  NO!  I no like crocodiles!  They not eat me!

Isabelle:  Yes, yes they will!

Me:  Fight them off with your sword and get back on the ship!

Eli: Yeah Sis.  I fight them.  I get on ship.

Isabelle, pretending to fasten a bunch of locks:  You cant get on the ship, I locked it up.

Eli:  Awww Mooo-oom.  I cant get on ship.  Sissy locked it.  *collapsing* Now crocodiles gonna eat me.  *crying* I not wanna get eated!

Isabelle:  Yup.  They are gonna eat you dead.

Me:  Eli, eat your (peanut butter) sandwich

Isabelle:   Eli it has germs in it.  You coughed on it.  Thats disgusting.  You are gonna eat germs.

Me: Isabelle cool it.  Eli there are no germs in your food.  EAT IT. 

Eli:  Awww Mom.  It has germs.  I no like germs.  I no wanna eat it.

Isabelle: *snicker*  (ok, I didn’t actually see this, but I am certain it happened)

Me:  Eli, you made your sandwich.  No one else touched it.  The only germs are yours.  You already have those in your tummy, so the ones in your sandwich will be fine.

Isabelle:  Haha!  Eli has germs in his tummy!  Eww!

Eli:  *collapse*  *cry*  There are germs in my tummy?!?

The only thing I can really think to say in wrapping this up is- Sorry Mom!


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Nan
    May 12, 2011 @ 20:38:25

    All I can say is he will live through it and will do the same to H. Oh the wonderful life of children. All that power and they know how to use it.
    Hope the germs are all good ones in his belly.


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